post birthday post

trying to grapple with life
trying to make sense
trying to tie all loose ends
but miserably failing to..

finding joy in small little things 
it brings a smile to my face..
but it fades away 
way to soon..

that sense of dissatisfaction lingers..
that missing of something intangible..
running behind it 
only makes it more unattainable..

like quicksilver
a mirage
or a beautiful dream 
something that is just beyond 
the grasp of my hand..

which slips through my fingers...
its like a shooting star
but there are a million stars in the sky..
which one do i want..?

i wish 
like yesterday,
there was just one...